No one can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending. - Marian Robinson
Being a single mom, I cannot help to think where is my happily ever after? The fairy tales I read as a little girl told me we all have a happily ever after. So where's mine?
I wrote down in my previous blog, Prince Turned Into A Frog, how my fairytale was something extraordinary. It's not the usual, And they lived happily ever after. Don't get me wrong. I actually enjoy being a single mom. It is not an easy task, but I am proud of what I do. I am contended. I am happy being single. Certainly, I am extremely grateful for my son. Having him in my life fills my heart with light and love. But at times especially when Addy asks, "where's daddy?" (although he's asking for my dad and not his real one) I begin to feel robbed of the false fairy tale of getting a complete normal family.
I know the time will come that I will be required to answer that question. So where is my happy ending? My happily ever after? How will I explain in to Addy in a way that he will not feel less of a person because his dad is nowhere to be found?
A happily ever after does not require finding a true love and growing old together although it would be nice. Maybe a happily ever after only requires you to love yourself. For me an absolute happy ending is seeing my son grow into a happy, successful young man whose success is defined by him not our society. Disregard the notion that society would have us believe that happily ever after requires you to be married to your soul mate, grow old together, and live happily ever after. Some are lucky to achieve this. Many of these people likely have their own challenges with health, finances, or a death of a loved one. We never know. Just because we have not and may never find our true partner does not mean we are robbed of own happily ever after.
Addy will learn there isn't a Santa Claus soon enough. Just as he'll come to realize that the gifts that were hidden and the treats that were secretly tucked beneath our tree did not actually come form a wise old man in whiskers, he will learn that mom and dad aren't perfect. Yes, Mom has made mistakes just as dad has. We're equally to blame in the failed relationship. But hopefully, Addy will know how much we both love him and want him to be happy. His dad may not be around but that doesn't mean he is less of a person because he is surrounded with a family who loves him the most. And most of all, he'll come to see that he has a family that will work together to hold his head above water when he's in a little too deep. He doesn't have to worry which parent will help him this time. He knows everyone in the family will.
A happily ever after only requires you to live successfully as you define success and ultimately for you to love yourself. So, be open to the universe. Be open to receiving the love the universe has to offer. And be open to loving and trusting yourself again, In that opening, you will find your happily ever after......
And, surprisingly, before I end this journal, I already know where my happily ever after is.....